Hegel This and Hegel That

"Number 27 on my bucket list: Go on all the roller-coaster rides - especially Top Gun." - Hegel

"Let's go to another pet store - that puppy in the window is staring at me." - Ivan Pavlov

"Number 28 on my bucket list: Have sex with my eyes open." - Hegel

A Moment of Silence for Vacations

"Are long white beards in fashion yet? No? Goodnight then." - Rip Van Winkle

"Ugh... more explosions? No more bomb shelters, next year we're vacationing at my mothers and that's final!" - Eva Braun

"I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! And I brought some incurable diseases with me and a few things/people that bite." - Charles Darwin

See The World, Punch A Dalai Lama

"Why would we see a play? Because it's fun that's why!" - Butch Cassidy to The Sundance Kid

"Today I feel............................ enlightened?" - Dalai Lama

"Around the world? The whole world? In a boat? Bullshit." - Ferdinand Magellan

Nazi Cakes, Western Friendships and One Dragon

"As American as... a pastry." - Schneider's Nazi Cakes

"Promise not to get mad? I used your tooth brush. You promised!" - Butch Cassidy to The Sundance Kid

"You're sounding a lot like a dragon I used to know." - St. George

It's Inquisition Time Kids!

"Rome, Let me assure you - we're sleeping head to toe." Mark Antony

"Bolivia! They'll accept our love in Bolivia, I'm sure of it." - Butch Cassidy to The Sundance Kid

"The mace is for gentle guidance, the rack for rehabilitation, the whip for encouragement, the red hot pokers for poking and the nice towels are for guests only." - Tomas de Torquemada, first Inquisitor General of Spain

It's Good To Be The Son Of God... Not So Much Voltaire

"Haven't you heard, I'm sooooooooooooooooooo witty." - Voltaire

"Hilarious, Apple pie... again." - Isaac Newton

"This is probably just the wine talking but guys... I think I'm going to come back from this." - Jesus "Back In My Day" Christ

Let's Go To Camp... Not You Houdini

"Eating six salt crackers in under a minute cannot and will not be done by man!" - Harry Houdini

"We don't see it as it is - we see it as it was... That's why you can't go to summer camp." - Carl "Dad" Sagan

"Beware of the person of one book, especially if it's heavy or has gilded corners - those hurt the most." - St. Thomas Aquinas

Good Ol' Boys Will Be Good Ol' Boys

"When I'm feeling blue I pull my stovepipe hat down past my chin and dream I'm a space man... my dogs go crazy when I do it." - Abraham Lincoln

"Asia minor eh? I'll take it!" - Alexander The Great

"Rum, sodomy and the lash... the party starts at nine." - Winston Churchill

Three People To Keep Away From Booze - Unless You Want A Novel

"George Harrison is my favourite Beatle. Let's see if America prints that!" - James Joyce

"Frag em' and Bag em'!" - Ulysses S. Grant

"Before I die I hope to find that rat bastard Mark Twain and the money he owes me!" - Samuel Clemens